I would like to share with you my two favorite stories from a recent homework assignment I gave my class. They were supposed to write about the worst thing they ever did as a child, but some of them got confused and wrote about bad things that happened to them. I did not correct spelling or grammar mistakes for this exhibition of raw, English as a foreign language talent:
My number one favorite, for purely humor reasons:
“Toilet was very herry up”
When I was 7 years old. I and my friends. At the school. Wer we was hungry because we played game but we don’t have lunch. When we have a class room. We was hungry after we went to eat a some food with hous’s a friend. When we arrived there it was don’t food but it has only fermented vegetable as so as we ate very fast. It’s very sour and hot. Then we have a class again. How about 2 hours we was stomach ache finally we run away to the toilet was very herry up.
And the runner up:
This story took place at Luang prabang, my hometown. As far as I remember, that time I was ten years old. That day the weather was very hot and I was thirsty. As soon as I arrived at school, I quickly went to buy a bottle of water. After I drank a half of water, I felt something stuck in my tooth. Slowly I spit it out. Oh my goodness. It was a dead fly. Suddenly, my breakfast came out from my stomach and I started crying loudly and loudly. Few minutes later, teachers and some students ran to see me. They thought that someone hit me, but when I told them all detail they laugh at me. I was really embarrassed.
Note the creative use of descriptive language to fill in specific words they don’t know. Words that you don’t really learn in school, like “diarrhea” and “vomit”. It is almost poetic how they do that.
I must be the best teacher ever.